i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize
