The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Acid is not a monday night drug
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
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