But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Randomize
