Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
this beer tastes like vomit already
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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