I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize
