woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize