Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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