I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
