guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
