dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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