He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
