so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Randomize