i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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