my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
