She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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