Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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