yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
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