Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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