I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
