I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize