Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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