I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
