do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
