He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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