Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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