John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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