Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
