question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
