it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
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