When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Randomize
