i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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