Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
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