so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I got inside last night via doggy door
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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