He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
