Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(423): View more from Tennessee

my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(423): my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead" http://tfl.nu/865j

Replies (2) Good night (640) Bad night (1623) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(985): View more from Louisiana

Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(985): Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with. http://tfl.nu/8rek

Replies (43) Good night (4675) Bad night (787)
Favorite
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(610): We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other. http://tfl.nu/212r

Replies (19) Good night (1889) Bad night (3113) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(303): View more from Colorado

I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(303): I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea. http://tfl.nu/cell

Replies (41) Good night (767) Bad night (6310) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(564): View more from Washington

I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(564): I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home. http://tfl.nu/c3b2

Replies (9) Good night (5344) Bad night (744) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(630): View more from Illinois

Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(630): Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music. http://tfl.nu/mqx0

Replies (12) Good night (3015) Bad night (1020) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(702): View more from Nevada

She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(702): She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note. http://tfl.nu/7aam

Replies (9) Good night (4582) Bad night (667) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(413): View more from Massachusetts

I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(413): I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face http://tfl.nu/hkq0

Replies (5) Good night (2179) Bad night (472) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(815): View more from Illinois

I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(815): I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs http://tfl.nu/01af

Replies (6) Good night (1637) Bad night (743) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(304): View more from West Virginia

I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.

(1-304): View more from West Virginia

Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?

(304): View more from West Virginia

No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(304): I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us. (1-304): Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat? (304): No there was a goat. I gave it a donut. http://tfl.nu/bds8

Replies (15) Good night (6259) Bad night (764)
Favorite
(479): View more from Arkansas

If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(479): If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough. http://tfl.nu/qsaq

Replies (12) Good night (3019) Bad night (574) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(317): View more from Indiana

Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(317): Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid. http://tfl.nu/n6yk

Replies (5) Good night (1107) Bad night (1272) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(562): View more from California

it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(562): it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats http://tfl.nu/6ylt

Replies (2) Good night (747) Bad night (394) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(785): View more from Kansas

My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(785): My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real http://tfl.nu/x4mj

Replies (3) Good night (2041) Bad night (240) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(760): View more from California

I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(760): I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right? http://tfl.nu/usy0

Replies (1) Good night (183) Bad night (405) Order T-Shirt

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: