I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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