I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
