Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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