Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  garbage

  (248): View more from Michigan

  garbage dick

  (847): View more from Illinois

  rubbish cock

  (248): View more from Michigan

  you win

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  (847) garbage (248) garbage dick (847) rubbish cock (248) you win http://tfl.nu/0jjx
  Replies (3) Good night (2490) Bad night (866)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  ..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.

  (1-828): View more from North Carolina

  nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz

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  (828): ..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels. (1-828): nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz http://tfl.nu/wr90
  Replies (6) Good night (1694) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"

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  (303): You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty" http://tfl.nu/y2bi
  Replies (21) Good night (1089) Bad night (5957)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.

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  (719): Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now. http://tfl.nu/m6w8
  Replies (25) Good night (4629) Bad night (1383)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"

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  (248): They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick" http://tfl.nu/5fi0
  Replies (13) Good night (4742) Bad night (964)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though

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  (505): I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though http://tfl.nu/889i
  Replies (9) Good night (1021) Bad night (2435)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.

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  (901): Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn. http://tfl.nu/sdqi
  Replies (6) Good night (573) Bad night (1935)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.

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  (816): Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays. http://tfl.nu/c3h2
  Replies (11) Good night (3069) Bad night (663)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..

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  (832): I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something.. http://tfl.nu/p35d
  Replies (6) Good night (1960) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion

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  (615): That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion http://tfl.nu/imr6
  Replies (3) Good night (774) Bad night (388)
• Favorite

  (898): View more from

  Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.

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  (898): Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous. http://tfl.nu/8yxh
  Replies (2) Good night (616) Bad night (290)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?

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  (859): Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut? http://tfl.nu/nfyo
  Replies (13) Good night (694) Bad night (348)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony

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  (708): You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony http://tfl.nu/8xhz
  Replies (1) Good night (327) Bad night (500)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.

  (817): View more from Texas

  Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".

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  (817): Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender. (817): Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii". http://tfl.nu/6w6n
  Replies (2) Good night (487) Bad night (263)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.

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  (512): Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale. http://tfl.nu/qpyu
  Replies (1) Good night (563) Bad night (292)

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