Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

I want leopard sheets

(1-248): View more from Michigan

haha sexcapades

(248): View more from Michigan

thats the plan

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.

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(512): View more from Texas

I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing

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(443): View more from Maryland

His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(804): View more from Virginia

he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?

(651): View more from Minnesota

Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better

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(607): View more from New York

I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila

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(940): View more from Texas

On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket

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(330): View more from Ohio

it wasnt that bad

(1-330): View more from Ohio

you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad

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