susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
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The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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