Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
