i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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