great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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