Sry I called you an 8
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize