rhymes with "ouble enetration"
do herpes really smell.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
