Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
