he puts the penis in happiness.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
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His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
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Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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