they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
