I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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