is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
