this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize