Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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