i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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